Microsoft

[TG Moses VI]

What seemed to be the problem?

[DeviantScripter]

Here’s a few of my favorite jokes:

Bill Gates dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him, ‘Welcome Mr. Gates, we’ve been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You’ve been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you’ve got me in a good mood, I’ll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you’ll be locked up forever.’
Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured.
He then takes him to a massive colosseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions.

Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a beautiful young blonde with an alluring look on her face, sitting at a table on which there is a bottle of the finest wine. To Bill’s delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says ‘I’ll take this option.’

‘Fine,’ says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room.

Satan locks the room after Bill. As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer.

‘That was Bill Gates!’ cried Lucifer. ‘Why did you give him the best place of all?’

‘That’s what everyone thinks,’ snickered Satan. ‘The bottle has a hole in it and the girl hasn’t.’

‘What about the PC?’

‘It’s got Windows 95!’ laughed Satan. ‘And it’s missing three keys.’

‘Which three?’

‘Control, Alt and Delete.’

Bill Clinton, Al Gore and Bill Gates all die in a plane crash.
They are standing before God, seated on His throne.

God asks Al: “What do you believe?” Al says: “I believe in the earth. I believe if we don’t protect it, the whole earth will die.”

God says: “I like that, come sit on my left. Bill Clinton, what do you believe?”

Bill Clinton says: “I believe in people. I believe the people should be empowered. I believe no one has the right to tell someone else what to do.”

God says: “I like that, come sit on my right. OK Bill Gates, what do you believe?”

Bill Gates says: “I believe you’re sitting in my chair.”

[TG Moses VI]

‘It’s got Windows 95!’ laughed Satan. ‘And it’s missing three keys.’

‘Which three?’

‘Control, Alt and Delete.’

Hahahahaha, good one. :lol:

[GeZe]

@Deviant:Scripter:

Lack of options. :wink:

you could always send a avater to desjon

[DeviantScripter]

I probably will. We need a little bi-partisan support around here. :wink:

Speaking of Microsoft, is anyone as glad as I am that the case is now over? Now we can spend our money going after real criminals, and not just big-business success.

Hehe…I’m probably the only one who likes Microsoft around here though… :lol:

[GeZe]

@Deviant:Scripter:

Hehe…I’m probably the only one who likes Microsoft around here though… :lol:

I think your right

[cystic crypt]

i don’t mind it.
have to get software from somewhere . . . .

[Yanny]

I am not glad the case is over. Microsoft got a slap on the wrist. They deserved to be broken up.

[TG Moses VI]

Usually I try not to make a habit of copying software… but in MicroSoft’s case I can make an exception… :wink:

[Guest]

@Deviant:Scripter:

Speaking of Microsoft, is anyone as glad as I am that the case is now over? Now we can spend our money going after real criminals, and not just big-business success.

Economic (and environmental) crimes are the ones doing most damage (in $s). Plus: maybe they don’t kill people directly, but they can ruin lots of lives, more than other crimes do.

[GeZe]

@cystic:

i don’t mind it.
have to get software from somewhere . . . .

if you want software get apple OS insatled, most software can be used with it

[cystic crypt]

@GeZe:

@cystic:

i don’t mind it.
have to get software from somewhere . . . .

if you want software get apple OS insatled, most software can be used with it

but that takes work and near super-geek prowess and skill.
but mostly i’m just too lazy.

[DeviantScripter]

if you want software get apple OS insatled, most software can be used with it.

LOL. But then you’d have to buy the whole friggin’ computer…. :lol:

[GeZe]

no I’m pretty sure you can un-instal windows

[DeviantScripter]

Sure, you can definitely un-install Windows. However, you can’t get Apple’s OS to run on a x86 chip, which is what the majority of Windows machines are.

[GeZe]

no i’m thimking of Unix